Tuesday, February 5, 2013

Cheryl Brooks ~ Wildcat (Cat Star Chronicles #9)

 I just...I can’t! I tried, I really did.

I used to LOVE the “Cat Star Chronicles”.
This is the main reason WHY I stayed for the ride even after reading “Stud” in all its gory relationship conflicts and ghastly sperm (or snard, if you will) related back stories.
I think that the biggest part of the attraction when it comes to the Cat Chronicles was the fact that these big kitty-cats were pretty monogamous and very very VERY rare, thus they turned in to HUGE puddles of goo when in love, and…well, when their mates got pregnant and SAVED THE SPECIES!

(Whooot! Whooot!)

This dimension is clearly GONE, if the hero is/was a stud prostitute that spread his semen in order to make (a gazillion) more little Zetithians.

(And PLEASE, I do NOT even want to go in to the utter futility of only THREE male Zetithians procreating en masse. That just makes one HECK OF A LOT OF little kittens with THE SAME DNA. NOT A GOOD BREADING GROUND FOR FUTURE GENERATIONS! But what the heck, right?)

Anyhow, I will not lie, there was a (somewhat boring) plot in this book. There were even some ex lovers, and jealousy thrown in just for good measure. A psychotic killer as well! Gosh, what a mix, right? Yay, oh yay.


And yet……my prime thoughts were always about the fact that my hero impregnated and/or fuc*ed half of the galaxy. There is just something utterly un-sexy about that.

Still, I hoped, and tried to push myself in to exceptance. Sadly, the “impregnation is divine”  plotline was just poking at me over and over again.But I think this horrible point was finally drilled in to me - full force - when Tarq from “Stud” was mentioned in the most bizarre sentence ever written.
You want me to clue you in?
You sure?

(You’ll be sooooory!)

We, the readers, were told how his FREAKING MATE (AKA WIFE AKA PARTNER) IS SO PROUD OF HIM FOR GETTING EVERYBODY AND THEIR GRANDMOTHER PREGNANT. Once I read this, I was almost ready to hurl all over my Kindle.
Species perseverance aside, there is just no way a woman in ANY GIVEN UNIVERSE is happy about her partner having swarms of children with different mothers.

Not that that was the only freaky “Thou shall be proud of your husbands mobile sperm” kind of thought.

At the time of her murder, Tarq had already left the Palace to go off on his own, traveling from planet to planet, leaving pregnant women in his wake like a farmer sowing seeds.

“You aren’t doing anything to keep from having children, are you?”
Sara’s eyes widened. “Well… no. I’m not.”
“Good,” Jack said with a firm nod. “Glad to hear it. Jerden’s already sired a bajillion kids, but a few more couldn’t hurt.”

Once again, Jack fixed her penetrating gaze on Sara. “All those other children don’t bother you, do they?”
Sara had already given this some thought and knew exactly how she felt about it. “No. That all happened before Jerden and I ever met. I mean, everyone has a past.” Some better than others.
“Good girl.” Jack nodded her approval. “Now that that’s all settled, let’s quit fiddling around and get this show on the road.”

Eh…sorry, what was this book about again?
I forgot.
Although I am suspecting that maybe this read was a weird propaganda pamphlet about pregnancy, disguised as a book.
I could be wrong, thou.
In the end it's not that I am giving up on these series because I just read the 9th (freaking!) book. It isn’t about the length of the series. It’s about prostitutes.

(There, I said it!)

Even some of the characters are baffled at how (some) Zetetians could suddenly become so promiscuous. Well, I am right in their boat!! I was used to one type of sexy, mouthwatering heroes in the earlier books, and this sperm-fest is just not cutting it for me.
Yes, sperm is sometimes NOT ENOUGH. Sad, but true.
I am guessing that people that like “reformed prostitute/stud” books will like this read (and the one before), as much as they would have been bored with the first 7 novels. But eh, to each their own.

This was just not my cup of tea.

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